It is time for me to sit down and type another installment. Things seem to be happening all the time, but I am not really aware of them until it is too late. There is so much I want to say, but I have no words in which to say them I guess I have run out of vocabulary at last.

 

My students are becoming a little easier to handle for the moment, though I will be glad to not have to teach Kindergarten anymore. I am not sure what I am going to be doing after my contract is up, but I am waiting to hear from the many possibilites, so I guess that is a good thing.

 

I have had to stop seeing the doctor and getting accupuncture. She is apparently the head of some doctors organization and has to go to Seoul every Saturday to give presentations. During the week she needs to prepare these, so she has little, if any, free time until November. I guess my quest to do an experiment on myself will have to go unfullfilled.

 

I have finally completed lesson plans and evaluations of my afternoon students. It was a long process, but I am finally complete. I guess it wouldn't have taken so long if I could have stayed focused on what I was doing, but, as usual, my mind just wondered from here to there and back again. I think it has something to do with reading the Anne of Green Gables series. I can't help but find myself starting to wonder what has really happend to me and what parts I have imagined. I am very much like Anne I think if I were to meet someone like her, we would get along quite well.

 

I am not sure how my life is going to turn out with all these weird dreams and possibilites, but I think that is part of the fun of it. I was supposed to go to Seoul today, but that didn't happen. They just opened an express train that would have taken me a little under 2 hours to get there, as opposed to the 4 hours by bus. How is that for service? I am here during many historical happenings it seems a shame to not be able to speak the language to be able to enjoy them more thuroughly.

 

I guess I am just bablling, so I am going to go. I thought I had something important to say, but I can't figure out what it could have been. I will talk to you later.

I warned you I would return tonight, but you didn't listen did you? I can feel you trembling as you read. You are wondering "what nonsense has he come up with now. What kind of terrible subject is he going to subject us to now? If only he knew that we can't sleep after reading these things, maybe, just maybe, he would not to send them anymore or at least he would write about happy things."

 

Well, I do know. And I delight in making you squirm in anticipation and horror. I revel in the idea that you are being exposed to almost every little detail of my life and you enjoy it in spite of everything. So as you keep reading, keep feeling, ask questions, make comments and snide remarks, make yourself heard! Communication is life, and that is what we all live for: life.

 

I went to MS Echo as planned. We had a wonderful debate about same sex marriages. It allowed me to gain some insight into what these particular individuals felt about marriage and what it is. The pros and cons gave interesting reasons for their beliefs, though I couldn't quite bridge the gap in the cons argument. They said they held no prejudices against homosexuals and didn't care if they lived together and all of that, but "why should they ask to be able to be married?" They said it was against nature for them to do that.

 

The pro side said that it was an infringement of personal choice and free will to not allow them to marry. One said that it was merely tradition that kept that law in place. Another said that democracy needs to protect the minority like homosexuals. They argued for quite some time. It even spilled over into our after dinner coffee at the university library (luckily we didn't spill any coffee).

 

I was more interested in the idea of what a minority really is. Is it really people who belong to a group that has less people, or just less power? Women are still a minority, but is there really less of them? It seems that everyone I talk to says that it is around 50-50 I have even heard that there were more women now. I haven't seem official census figures, so I don't know for sure, but it is an interesting thought nonetheless.

 

I was suppose to meet with my Korean tutor (Han Soojung) and my doctor (Dr. Kim) this evening, but even though I sent Soojung an email that I would call her cell, she didn't take it with her. I guess she didn't get my message. I think it is a little strange to not have your cell phone with you, but I guess she has her reasons.

 

I guess I should talk about my counseling a little bit now as it is a growing part of my life now. Right now I feel like it is part of some research project that I am doing. I am not quite sure fully what the doctor-patient relationship permits, but the trip to Busan, whatever we were supposed to do tonight, plus the traditional Korean opera she has invited Soojung and I to the first weekend in April seems a little beyond that scope. I could be wrong, but I am sure I would never feel comfortable doing things like that with people I was counseling. I guess that is why I am grabbing onto this opportunity. I would probably never be allowed to observe such happenings as they would be deemed unethical, but I feel it will be interesting to see how I feel as the time progresses. Will it interfere with the counseling? Will I find that she is manipulating me? Will it be possible to tell?

 

Dr. Kim said she wants to get to know more about how I think. She wants me to make my week long scheduale more detailed, and to keep my schedule with me and to write down how I feel as I complete each thing on it (or fail to complete it). I guess this is a good thing, but I still hate homework. She has decided that I don't need medicine at this time as my main problem is in my head, so acupuncture and counseling are enough. She believes that most of my problem is that I am afraid. She used the shopping example to explain her reasoning. There have been times I have needed to get food but have failed to do so for weeks at a time. I would go to the store 4 or 5 times during that time span, look around, and leave without purchasing anything. She explained that she thinks I may be afraid to get something that I wouldn't like that I would feel that I made a bad choice and, therefore, failed at shopping. It makes since, though I don't think it is quite accurate, though I suppose it may have a little truth to it.

 

I guess the extra events we do would be a means of her getting to know how I think in real life situations she wouldn't need to rely on just what I say. I guess this could be helpful, but I am still uncertain as to whether this is permitted. I have no problems on my side of it, and, like I said, it is interesting to think of where it will go. I will keep you informed.

 

By the way, I am trying to view movies for my Jr. TESOL course, but I seem to be having some sort of problem. I can now see them, but I can't hear the sound. Is there something I my side that could be the problem? I am using Real Player. If you have any clue, please let me know.

 

I am going to try to go to church tomorrow I haven't been for the past 3 weeks. I may walk there as it will only take 20-25 minutes. If the weather is nice, it will be a good walk. I could use the excercise and I love walking. It is getting late, so I should go home to my new place and try and figure out what I am going to do with all the clothes I have strewn about drying. I was unable to get my rack back, so I have to go buy another one. I guess that is life it could be worse, eh?

I was going to write this last night, but I ran out of time. I finally am completely moved into my apartment, and the gas is hooked up!!! I was worried when they hadn't had it hooked up two nights ago, though they told me they would. Sometimes I think they forget about things like that.

 

Anyway, the big window next to my bed is wonderful. I never new how much I missed the sun until now that I can see it shining so brightly through my new window. I think I like this apartment and all will be well with it.

 

Well, Thursday after classes I was told that I need to try and be more interesting in my Kindergarden class. I wish I knew what I was doing! Anyway, any suggestions on interesting for 4-5 year olds would be appreciated. Times like this make me realize just how much I miss working with the high school students in Upward Bound. I may not have been the most exciting person, but I was able to be a little helpful to them (the teenage years are such troubled ones it is fun to be able to go through them again though it only be vicariously ).

 

Yesterday I went to the doctors yet again. I had a splittling headache ever since lunch, and I felt really nausous. She decided to give me a treatment and then see if I was able to endure counseling after that. This time I received acupuncture in the arms, hands, legs, and feet as usual, but also in the head and the stomach for the pain and nausea. She also gave me the suction cups on the back treatment I have only seen on TV. Quite interesting.

 

The needles in the head and stomache were left in for 15 min. While I lie still under a heating lamp. I felt like a turkey that had been left to bake, but it didn't hurt. In fact it actually felt good. I am surprised by how well the treatment worked. When I went home I ate hot poridge as directed. The reason for my headache was probably an interaction between what I had eaten and the acupunture. I didn't realize that such interactions could be possible, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

 

My classes are all going well, other that my boredom and theirs in Kindergarden. I am off to MS Echo now I am going to be a little late, but these things happen. I have more to tell, so I may be on again tonight typing away. I'll talk to you all later.

The days have been passing quite quickly since I wrote last. I am not sure things are getting any better, but I am surviving.  I finally  moved into my  new apartment! I have to put my refrigerator in my room because they set up the washing machine in the kitchen instead of the bathroom. It isn't a bad thing, just a little odd.

 

I did have a weird experience this morning. I decided to spend my first night in my new apartment last night. This morning I heard water running at about 6am (an English grammer cop would have a fit over that sentance). It wasn't very light out, so I went back to sleep. I woke up again, looked at my watch it said 7am.  I was still tired, so I closed my eyes. When I opend them again my watch still said 7am. It felt as if I had been lieing there for an eternity, and it was brighter than it had ever been at that time before, so I figured my watch must be broken.

 

I jumped out of bed, got my clothes out of my suitcase (I still haven't unpacked), ran into the bathroom to try and take a shower. While I waited a little for the water to heat up, I ate some naked bread for breakfast. I went back and felt the water. The sudden iceyness woke me to the fact that the gas had yet to be turned on. I had to be content with a brisk washing up.

 

Then I ran to the door, slipped on my shoes (being careful not to actually slip on my shoes), and tried to open the door. It wouldn't open. Of course, I locked the dead bolt silly me! I flipped the switch, turned the handle, and walked right into the door. I couldn't figure out why it wouldn't open. I spent 10 minutes trying to see if the deadbolt was unlocking properly, but it seemed to be functioning correctly. I was in a hurry, so I decided to go out the window.

I climbed out the window and took the couple of minutes to properly shut the windows. When I turned around I noticed an older lady looking up at me. I tried to ignore her stares, but I had to walk right by her when I came down the stairs. This being the case, I decided to nod to her as I passed by she returned the nod with a dubious look on her face.

 

I rushed to X-Mall, waited impatiently for the elevator, releaved when it finally arrived. I hate to be late, and I wasn't sure just how late I was. When the elevator doors opend upon the 5th floor, much to my surprise, I was faced with a gate! As it turned out, my watch was fine. It was two hours before I needed to be there.

 

Wednesday I went back to the doctor. She is going to tell me if she thinks I need any medication on Friday. She placed me into one of the four personality characteristics though that was quite cool. I don't have it with me at the moment, but basically this particular personality tends to be emotional, think of others first, and frequently think they have done somehting wrong even when they haven't. Like I needed a doctor to tell me that!  

 

The homework is interesting though. I have such a hard time doing it, but I know it is necessary. I have to write about events that happen, if they are good or bad, and why I think that. Then she gets to read them and talk to me about them! Along with that, she now wants me to make a schedule each night for the following day (more like a to do list I think) and also one for the week. This ought to be an interesting task as I never really know what i am doing from one moment to the next. Maybe that is part of my problem, eh?

 

I am about out of time, so I will let you savor this adventure for as long as you can. I hope to be able to give you another taste before this one has stopped linguring on you lips.

 

Another day, another adventure. At the moment I am supposed to be participating in an online class discussion or teaching session or something, but the teacher isn't there like she is supposed to be, and only one other student is there. So, I am taking the time to write another adventure, which should have been written yesterday.

 

Yesterday I woke up feeling a little upset at the head teacher. I ran into her yesterday and she told me I had to move out Sunday as the new teacher would be here Monday night. So, instead of going to church I started to pack (still am not finished). Then, as I was leaving to meet the people to go to Busan, she was pulling up to pick up another one of the teachers she told me that the new teacher wouldn't be comming until later, so I didn't have to worry about moving so quickly (she didn't say when the new teacher would be  coming though). Not a good begining, but I let it pass.

 

I must make my digression  at the begining of this section  so I can call it background information this seems to be more acceptable. It seems that doctor-patient relationships are a little more flexible here in Korea. For my trip to Busan, I went with my doctor and the translator she bought lunch, paid for the bus tickets and the taxi fares she acted as a tour guide for us. It was interesting to take part in this after having taken courses that seemed to say that this was not a good idea.

 

Now on to the trip itself. The bus ride took half an hour and then we took a cab to the International Market. They weren't kidding when they said they had just about everything there! It was overwhelming, but as I was with people who loved to shop, it was alright I just followed them. I went through the many of the stalls, found what I was looking for, and was glad to be out of there. Then we went to the Lotte Department Store, and then to Hyundai Beach.  Very relaxing at the moment, but it is full in the summer.

 

 

The trip was nice for my vanity though. It seemed that no matter where I went people were all saying how handsome I am. It was like they had never seen a foreigner before, but Busan, and the International Market itself, has many, many foreigners. One person said I looked like I was British, one thought I was Russian, and one said that I looked like a movie star. I guess I am one of those unknown famous people, eh? I was thinking I should go into showbiz just because people have said things like that to me. Though I don't think I could handle being famous it feels too weird. I was even stopped on the beach by two random girls who wanted to get their picture taken with me.

 

Well, the discussion has begun, though the teacher is not there, so I will go now. I have to go back to work soon anyway. I don't like the timing of many of the things that happen, but I guess that is all right.

I went in for my second treatment of acupuncture today. I was late meeting my Korean tutor, who is also the one translating for me and the doctor, because I finally was able to see the new apartment I am going to be moving into. It is rather small, but I like the location: far enough away to allow for quietness and privacy, yet near enough to walk to within 10 minutes.

 

After the acupuncture session I studied Korean for a little while. Most of what I studied had to do with the Korean government as they just impeached their president, which has never happend before. I think it may be an interesting meeting tomorrow afternoon with the MS Echo group. I am very interested to find out what they think about all this.

While I was waiting for Mrs. Young to take me to see the apartment, a phone call came into Kids Club. This normally wouldn't concern me, but it sounded like (from what I could hear the one who took the message tell Mrs. Young) the phone call was either for or about Jay hyun-ooh. I thought that was quite interesting as that is my Korean name, but no one who called work for me would use it. I didn't say anything, though I am thinking maybe I should have, just to see what was going on. Maybe I'll tell the one who took the message my Korean name Monday and see if she makes a connection.

 

Today I made bean sprout soup and kimbap for my students in my 4:30 and 6:00 classes. They enjoyed them though the food wasn't quite as good as it could have been. I put a little too much sesamee oil in the soup and I should have put a little on the kimbap. I guess I just have to live and learn, eh?

 

In my Kindergarden class, the little girl who doesn't ever say anything in English actually repeated the word 'three' after me and also told me what color sticker she wanted! This was such a thrill for me. I guess it really is the little things in life that I find to be the most rewarding.

 

I am going to be going to Busan on Sunday to the International Market. I have never been there, but I hear it is very cheap and has everything available. I need to make  a list of things I would like before going if I don't there won't be enough time to look at everything and I may not get what I need. I am always having a hard time deciding what to get, so this will be a good time to practice the whole list thing.

 

I am going to go now as I need a little bit of sleep. I will talk to you all later.

Well, it seems a lot has been going on lately, but I am not really sure what it is. I went to the doctors today she had a lot of questions for me. She wanted to get to know my family background and enviornment. I couldn't help but think of the classes I took that talked about just this thing.

 

After our long discusion (via an interpreter) and a quick check of my pulse on both wrists, she decided that my chi (energy) was not going throughout my whole body: it is only downward energy. She said this is effecting my interpersonal relationships and is causing recurring depression. Her reccomendation is counseling and acupuncture.

 

So, I was administerd the first treatment this evening. The needle she used reminded me of a small insulin needle (or just one that is used to check blood sugar levels). It only goes in about .05cm and doesn't hurt as much as a pin prick in fact, I barely felt it at all. Of course I had no idea what to expect and was a little scared to begin with, but, as usual, it turned out all right.

 

I am required to undergo at least two more treatments. She said she will provide the counseling for free, but I need to pay for the acupunture treatments. Normally all her patients have insurance cards, but since my institute does not provide them (they decided it would be better to just reimburse half of what we pay) I have to pay the full 5,000 won (that is a little less than $5). Not a bad price.

 

As for the counseling, she does a good job. She seems to ask the questions I know you are supposed to ask as well as other relevant ones. I think the thing that impresses me the most is that she actually looks at me and talks to me when she speaks even though she is speaking in Korean. She understands most of my answers, but she is unable to actually speak English, thus my Korean tutor serves as a translator.

 

This is a situation I had never really heard of before. It was not in any of the books from which I studied, and it seems like an odd arrangement, but I have no doubt that it can be just as effective. I guess this is the adventure I undertook by going to an Oriental Hospital.

 

The teaching is going well. My kindergarden students are starting to be real students and testing my patients, but they are cute and are learning. I can put up with their antics for a while at least. There are two that have almost no attention span, so it is difficult to plan projects at one level it just doesn't work.

 

The other teachers, on the other hand, are getting on my nerves! They have all been grumpy and complaining about the institute, the Korean education system, the students, the parents, and Korea in general. I could take it if it were just one or even two of them, but it is all of them! I am not sure what is going on, but I had to try to protect myself from it today, though I wasn't very successful.

 

I will talk more later about this whole weird senario, but I must go for now. Feel free to email me if you have any questions, comments, or want me to write about some event in particular. I am always glad to get emails, even if it is from people I don't know (or those who like to pretend they don't know me).

HEy there again. My kindergarden class was, for the most part, a little less on edge today. I have eight students: Jill, Tony, Calvin, Victoria, Sam, Henery (with the extra e), Melissa, and June. They are all around 5 years old and can be very active. There was a lot more laughing today than yesterday, and they are actually getting to know their names  (though no one wants to say them yet).

 

I am still a little worried about June she has huge  mood swings. One minute she seems to be enjoying herself, and the next, for no apparent reason, she looks as if she is about to burst into tears. I actually caught her starting to cry on her way to lunch while she was laughing just minutes before. I really wish I could get into her head (though it would probably be really scary and a little crowded).

 

The afternoon went alright. I found out that one of my students isn't coming back and another one will be leaving as well. They are starting middle school and don't have time. I hate to see the good students go, but I suppose it is for the best. Tomorrow I will see if the one who came back from Canada will still be in my class.

 

I will be given the choice of moving to a new appartment soon. The new teacher is set to arrive either this week or next and they have found a new appartment. Mrs. Young said she thinks I will like it I think it will be good just to get out of living in the institute. It is convenient, but there are too many disadvantages with this particular place.

 

I guess that is all for now I am out of time and money. But tomorrow is payday, so no worries. Talk to you all later.

Well, the first day with my new students is over. It  started out being just what I feared it would be: the students didn't want to talk, didn't want to pay attention, and they knew very little English (they new how to count, but so far that is about it). I had to show one or two of them how to hold a pencil, and we practiced writing the letter 'a' and the number zero (both the digit and the word).

 

I wasn't sure how or where to start with them, so I started at the most logical place I could think of: their names. It took some doing, but they finally understood that I wanted them to tell me their English names, which most of them didn't know. Luckily we were all supplied name tags to wear these first few days. Most of them now know what their own English name is, though not all of them yet.

 

We had a time where I had them color. It was interesting to watch how they all chose the colors and what type of plan and care, if any, went into it. I am really worried about one of them, June. She looked like she was going to cry most of the time and did not want to smile for anything. When she was coloring, she didn't start until I did, even though all the other students were coloring. There were two pictures and I stopped after coloring the first one to make it easier to see how the students were doing. She wouldn't color the second picture until I started as well. I am not sure if this is an over application of the rule that it is impolite to start or finish before the eldest at the table, or if it is something a little different.

 

After that we all sat on the floor and I read them two stories. They seemed to like them, though I am not so sure they really understood them. One was about forgeting and remembering and the other was about the worst monster in the world. Then I made them stand up and walk around in a circle. I was actually trying to get them to march, but that was not going to happen. I also tried to teach them what I wanted when I said "line up". I think I will have to work on that one a little more as well.

 

I was pleased when June finally laughed. She seemed to loosen up a little, though when I saw her later on she was still in the frowning, no one talk to me look. I was moving the table and accidentally knocked a chair onto my toe. As it hurt, I said 'ouch'. Now all my students know ouch. When we lined up for lunch they were all saying "ouch" and holding some part of their body where the fake pain was located it was sooo cute!

 

This afternoon it snowed! It really snowed, but it didn't stay. It was neat nonetheless. Then I got another surprise: the student who went to Canada so very long ago (though no one told me she had been accepted to go) returned! As she didn't have my class today, I just got to see her in the hallway. She was bouncing up and down so much you would have thought she was on a spring. She was so excited about being back. I made her try to tell me about how things went, but her English isn't the best, so I received limited information. She was surprised to see my hair longer than when she left.

 

Even though they probably don't put too much weight in the recommondations, I like to think that I had a part in her opportunity to go to Canada. I guess I just like to feel like I am making a difference in someone's life.

 

I went to the doctors today, but I didn't get a chance to see her there was too many people in front of me and lunch time was too short. I also made some bean sprout soup it turned out well, but it needed a little more salt they said. I will try again some other time. What is the best way to slice garlic anyway? I had such a hard time slicing it for this dish.

 

Anyway, that is all from what may seem like a boring life, but one in which I am very excited. My spirits rose at least fifty feet today!

The day has been a long one. It wouldn't have been, but I spent most of it trying to get out of bed. I guess my body just doesn't like all the changes I have been doing. I need to keep a sleep schedule or something, otherwise I am not going to be able to put up with my students.

 

Speaking of students, I am going to have my first day with my new kindergardeners tomorrow I am sooo nervous! Them being new, young, and knowing no English all serve as things to intimidate me. I am beginning to think that the only reason I am here is to see how many ways I can be intimidated and how I stand up to them. It is some sort of test I need to pass in order to graduate to the next phase of my life whatever that may be.

 

I got a new student in two of my classes today. My M-F 3:00pm class welcomed a person who has had English before, but this was his first time at Kids Club. He came with the name of Paul, which is the name of another boy in that class. One of the other teachers told me to change it to avoid confussion, but I am electing not to. You can't change someone's name just because it happens to be the same as someone elses. Besides, he came with that name maybe there is a reason behind it. WHo am I to go changing somones name for the sake of my own convenience. Seems a little arrogant to me.

 

The other one was a girl in my TH 4:30pm class. It seems like she has been in Kids Club with the Korean teachers. Her understanding of English is good, though I am not sure about her conversational English I need more time to check on that. Her name is Hara (I am not sure if that is her English name or her Korean name, though it doesn't really sound Korean to me). She seems to fit in well with the class, so I am happy about that.

 

I have run into more problems, though none have to do with life here in KOrea. I am convinced that the US is trying to cause me to become insane so they can bring me back where they can keep a better eye on me. Maybe they feel I am some sort of threat to national security or something :) Of course you all know I am pretty much harmless.